I'd stay away from ass-to-mouth. You don't know how it's going to affect her immune system.

How the hell do people think that just because we're in Mexico that it's totally cool to come into somebody's house and wait for them unannounced?

It's going to take more than a goddamn speak-and-spell to win yourself into the good graces of Kenny Powers.

You're gonna pull that Bruce Lee shit with me I'll steal that sword from you like a goddamn child and fuck you with it.

Well look at this... a goddamn Mexican standoff in fucking Mexico. I was hoping to get into one of these before I left.

I know what you're talking about. I used to be just like you yesterday... Sad inside, compensating by acting like a fucking cock sucker. But I saw the light, dude, I've changed. Well... well, I went on a personal quest and faced my demons, but for you, the change can be a lot easier. Let me back on the team for one more game. There's a scout coming and I intend on fucking his world up with my skills. Or, we can finish this duel and murder each other.

If I can fucking nail this goddamn baseball shit tonight I'm going back to America a goddamn champion. I'm fucking three days away from sucking on some big ol' titties!

Did you hurt my feelings? Yes, you did. I will give you that victory. But the one victory you will not have is the most important. I'll admit, that sweet tailpipe of yours did have me charmed. It put a spell on me. But all the ass-magic in Mexico can't change Kenny Powers from his core beliefs. Not an ass man. I'm a tit man. I like big ass boobs. Now, and forever. I'm not like a black guy, Vida.

We both knew this wasn't going to last forever. You're like the girl the Godfather fucked back in Italy. You know, what we had was important, but the real deal is waiting for me back at home.

I'm genuinely am sorry. I brought you guys up from less than fucking nothing and took you up to a championship level, only to leave you high and dry. Naked and nude. Prey. Easy targets for the competitions to rape and butt-fuck you. I'm sorry for that.

Don't get too cocky, Roger. That's probably because there is a little residual Kenny Powers pixie dust floating around all your little heads. Let's face it guys, after midnight, this whole fucking place turns into a pumpkin. And you guys all turn back into mice. This is a classic Cinderella tale, here. You know, Peter Pan will no longer be a man. He'll turn into a real boy. George Washington will never be able to cut down the beanstalk, and you guys will eventually just go back to being the shittiest Mexican baseball team in Mexico. These are the hard realities, guys. Life is not a fairy tale. Although, sometimes it feels like our world is full of fairies. You know who I'm talking about. I still accept you, brother. Purity. It's what we all desire. And it's what I've come here to share with you, hence the all whites. We can do some fucking great things tonight, you guys. Follow me. Walk with me out onto that field. And when you do, you fucking put your ass out and you raise your fucking head up. Know that you'll never ever, ever, reach the heights you'll reach tonight. That you can leave here knowing that you helped Kenny Powers' dreams come true. For a bunch of Mexican baseball players, that ain't too bad.

See ya, Juanito. Take care of those warts.

The game ball. Thanks. Roger. I'll put this with my collection of personal achievements. I mean, not right next to the good shit, but still.

Too hot for hugs, here. I've been battling the war on swamp ass since I been down here.

If that's what it takes, then a cock and dream it will be... sucked upon. Let's suck my dream's dick!

Just like that, the journey is over. Depression is finished and you're on your way back to the world of the living, smiling, regular people. The road has been paved with dick-heads, back-stabbers, and pains in the fucking ass. But, memories were made, allies were had, pole-smokers were toppled, and the truth was discovered. And like any journey, if you stay the course long enough, the road might just show you what you need. All you got to do is keep your eyes on the road and you foot on the fucking gas.

Whenever I look at a Mexican, I will think of you. Whenever you look at that jackass, you think of me.

I don't think we ever really got over that language barrier. What the fuck? You speak English? You've spoke English the whole time I've been here? Five years old? Whheew! You don't look a day over a hundred and ten. All the talks we could have had! All the wisdom you could have shared! Crazy I find this out right now, soon as I'm leaving this fucking country.